It’s later than you think. It really is. Time seems to be sprinting by me these days. So many things can change the direction of this adventure we call life. A sickness. A change at work. A new challenge. A new time constraint. An accident.
So, I’ve taken this truth and shifted the way I prioritize things. Some people are critical of me when I say I put myself first. I have two daughters who must be more important than me. How selfish of me to put myself before them! But seriously people, how can I provide for them, or be the best I can be for them if I’m not taking care of me. I put myself first so that I can be completely selfless in the way I parent. With this contentment, I can, with a clear mind, be the mother they really need. Further, they don’t grow up, feeling a sense of entitlement that their needs are pedestalled far above their caregivers. They acknowledge first hand, the benefits of a content and happy mother. We all win.
It needs to be paramount. No longer am I taking a back seat to the needs and wants of everyone else in my circle. My kids are right up there with me, don’t get me wrong. I’ve learned, though, that a “me” that feels valued and important is much more generally happy. And that person spends very little time begrudging, rushing and miserable. I don’t feel guilty for organizing time for me. I no longer stress over the people in my life who are simply takers. I’ve identified the givers in my circle; the genuine people. I’ve pulled them closer and let the others fade into the shadows. The givers are so excited about my new direction, they simply stand alongside my new route and cheer me on. They support me in ways I never knew existed before. It feels so good, that I return the favour. They know that I’m a better friend, mother, daughter, sister, co-worker because of it. They celebrate that I’ve put myself first.
I am mindful that I need to enjoy my time now because my adventures tomorrow may not be as fortunate and as fulfilling as the ones I enjoyed today. But going into tomorrow with my best interests in mind, makes the unknown exciting, the potential troubles more bearable and the victories sweeter. I’m pretty damn important. I’m going to enjoy myself.